The Teacher's Dinner Fiasco: My Weekend (Part 4 of 4)

This, my friends, is a true fiasco if there ever was a fiasco.

After the wedding, all of the Swaton employees headed over to the teacher's dinner. When I say all, I mean all but Rose. She said she just felt too uncomfortable going knowing that she wasn't really part of the team there anymore. Plus there was the tension with Mrs. Gu (and there was...and is...indeed tension). That should have been my first clue to back out. Rose is usually kind of a tone setter for these kinds of things.

Apparently, they have this dinner every year to thank everyone and just have a good time. And have a good time some people did.

I sat down at a table with all the male staff of Swaton. This was mostly just the foreign teachers, but also Smith, the one male Korean teacher, and Kevin, who's job I don't really understand. Kevin seems to do pretty much everything at Swaton--everything but teach. He's a great guy and whoops my butt at Starcraft. We're friends, even though we can barely communicate (his English is about as good as my Korean).

Well, the guys like to drink, and the booze was free. I could probably just leave it at that, and you could pretty much imagine the rest, but I'll keep going. Darryl, Chris, and Logan had started drinking early in the evening at Darryl's house. I was with them but decided to abstain. Logan, in particular, had quite a bit before we even made it to the wedding.

Having their pre-party buzzes going, they kept them up with an endless steam of beer and the infamous soju. If you haven't read my earlier post about soju, just know that it's potent stuff, deceptively potent stuff.

I kept my drinking to beer and am glad I did.

Before dinner even started, Logan was getting loud. By the time dinner was over, all three of the other guys were whooping it up. I decided to head on over to the ladies table and chat with them, but even though I was about 20 feet away or so, I wasn't left out of the conversation.

Now here's where the fiasco really begins: they expected us to sing. Darryl had selected a song before we even got to the party. It was some remake of a pop song by Wham. Now, I'd like to say that I've kept up on my Wham song bibliography over they years, but I had never heard this song before. I don't even remember the title, all I remember is that the first line was "Last Christmas I gave you my heart..." I'm not sure where it went from there for two reasons. 1) Because they may have dragged me up on stage, but I sure as hell wasn't singing. Apparently they didn't realize that I wasn't drunk too. 2) I had no idea what they were singing: Chris was mumbling quietly. Darryl was only saying a word here and there. And Logan was belting it out, but I'm not sure he was singing in English.

They dragged me back to the guys table when we were finished.

"Fiasco!" Logan yelled and slumped into his seat.

Points were given out after other people were given an opportunity to sing. We didn't do well. Logan was particularly mad about this.

"We were robbed," he yelled and then made it clear that he was leaving soon.

By leaving soon, he must have meant stick around for another half hour and talk about leaving, because that's what he did. But when he finally did go, he took the other two with him.

"Ryan, come on," Darryl leaned over and said. "Let's get out of here."

"Where are you going? I don't have cash to do anything." This was an excuse, but it was also true. See my computer post.

"I don't know yet, but we'll cover you. You need to come out with us."

Well, I didn't. One by one they went outside and never came back. Things got quieter, but not necessarily any more sane.

The singing continued. Then dancing. Then parodies of game shows. And lots and lots of talking...all in Korean, so I had no idea what was going on. No idea what was going on for at least another hour and a half.

I stuck it out, but I was bored as hell. I caught Rachel on the way back from the restroom.

"Are you having fun?" she asked.

"Not so much." I said.

"Me either," she said and headed back into the dinner. I was thinking of ducking out, but I figured if she could do it, I could.

I signed when it was all over and went straight of the elevator. It was packed in, mostly with people from other schools owned by the same people that own Swaton, but Smith was also in the elevator with me. He didn't have the headstart that the foreign teachers had, but he was still a little tipsy.

"Ryan, I'm so impressed you stayed."

"Nah, it's nothing." I said.

"No, I mean it. You got to see me sing, and you stayed. I'm really impressed. It means a lot to me."

"Okay," I said. "It's really no problem."

Then he said something to everyone in the elevator in slurred Korean that I didn't understand. Apparently it was about me because the other elevator riders all started clapping and patting me on the back. I'm not exactly sure why.

I talked to Smith for a second when we got to the bottom and then walked home, still bored and a little out of it for letting my mind wander for a few hours. I walked home even though it was cold and nearly a two mile walk. But then, these things happen.

R